I'll explain.
For one thing, every time I see a skinny girl wearing a fedora and sunglasses, I automatically think I have run into Lindsay Lohan. I feel the same way in New York City, except it's every time I see a man, I assume he's gay..and in NYC I'm always right (in LA, further investigation reveals it is never Lohan).
In LA, eating frozen yogurt for every meal is acceptable, but only if the name of the fro-yo supplier is catchy or trendy. Bonus points for puns. The yogurt shop "Fro-play" is kind enough to give us our daily fix of the sexual pun, something I've been missing since Sex and the City stopped making new episodes.
Seriously, though, I've gotten out of control with this fro-yo business. "21 Choices" in Pasadena has become my new crack den. Nobody tells you that one of said choices in black tar heroin. When you finally notice you're hooked, it's too late. You can't be blamed, though, because one of the other choices was frosted animal crackers, and those girls behind the counter knew what they were doing when they offered you those samples.
I also feel like every man you talk to here is some how involved in the biz (that's what we call the entertainment industry for all you people who have real jobs and aren't lucky enough to have a coke problem). The real magic is that even when an unattractive, unemployed guy is shamelessly hitting on you, you can take solace in the fact that he has an uncle who's an agent or a famous sister. And they can also get you a part in their step dad's new movie, so you should definitely, definitely sleep with them.
And if all this wasn't enough, In N Out is totally yum-nummers! Animal style, y'all!
